Did you even notice I posted 4 times yesterday?
It was like I was trying to force my funny to return......Like one of those Jon Benet parents who keeps shoving their poor ugly little kid up on stage, thinking that if they just keep competing, eventually they'll win.....And maybe someday become Donald Trumps next plaything.
Oh! I forgot to mention one of my Funny Award winners (Foul Sally) yesterday. <----see yesterdays post about me being an ass.
Weird News....
So yesterday, I watched Zombieland. It was pretty funny. Don't know if it was as good as Shawn of the Dead or the Army of Darkness movies, but it was good.
Anyway, looky what I found when I came in this morning:
LEAD STORY: Based on models of rampant infectious diseases, say researchers, civilization would be doomed if we were ever attacked by zombies.
Coincidence?........
(I threw that in for all the Zombie fans......Narm, Jay, Shine, Travis, and whoever else I missed)
Quick question....which if better Zombies or Bacon? ........And would your answer change if I was talking about Rob Zombie and Kevin Bacon?
Now for my WYR (Would You Rather).....dang! I wish I hadn't already wasted that one on Zombies, it would sooo go here.
Would you rather:
Die a violent and very painful, but somewhat quick death.....a la Nick Berg beheading with a dull pocket knife?
OR
After suffering a long drawn out illness.......a la Patrick Swayzee or Ted Kennedy?
Ok, both of those are sick and terrible, but I was trying to stay with the whole Zombies it's almost Halloween theme.
On that note:
So, we have been trying to do Family Devotions around our house. I know, I said I wouldn't get preachy on here, but just wait you heathen.
Anyway, the devotions consist of us sitting around, usually after dinner, with the kids and reading from this Family Devotions book. It usually starts with some scripture verses, a story to apply the verses to everyday life, some insightful questions, a memory verse, and then we close with a prayer.
Ok, so on this particular day in question, the story part had to do with bullying. My 10 yr old was reading the story, and the wife & I were just partially paying attention, when we hear our son say the main character's name is "Ho".
That got our attention, cause we thought he was mispronouncing it. He kept saying, "Ho said this" and "they called Ho that." Then we realized the character was Asian, and not a working girl or a promiscuous teenage slut.
Eventually, the other kids in the story started bullying "Ho" by calling her "slant-eyed"........That was it!....I felt my filter slipping.......I couldn't handle it........I blurted out "SLANT-EYED HOE! HA!"...............Totally ruin devotion time........The wife and I were cracking up. The kids didn't get it (thankfully).
Today's trivia question:
I'm thinking of a letter between 1 and 10.......what time is it?
15 comments:
probably drawn out. at least then you know it's coming.
Bacon is better.
Yes it would because I hate Kevin Bacon.
Quick death, so I can use my ninja skills.
You can't turn down that kind of set up. Really. That's like me serving to Andy Roddick at the US Open. He's gonna pound that like Chris Brown on a lady.
It's 4:30.
Bacon is better and thank goodness you were not referring to Kevin Bacon....YUCK
and I vote for the quick death...then my kids can mae up cool stories about how I was saving a squirrel from a mountain lion and a meteor hit me and i went up in flames causing the most recent wildfire that has turned the state into an energy source.
bacon is the grossest and zombies rule. and i don't wanna die.
bacon is the grossest and zombies rule. and i don't wanna die.
It would be foolish of us to expect anything to be as good as Army of Darkness. That being said, I'm jealous over all you bastards that went and saw Zombieland without me.
As for today's WYR -- give me the long, drawn out illness, so I can take one last shot at my enemies before I go.
I'm taking the long drawn out illness, cause every one knows that cancer patients get the BEST drugs!
Zombie or Bacon...hmmm...I take Rob, cause his wife is HOT, and Kyra is soooo NOT!
And you would've been in sooooo much trouble for the "Racial Slur HO" joke at my house! For shame!!
and...the 80s are in baby! "It's Hammer time!"
hmmm long and drawn out death. they give the good drugs for that shit.
yr thinking of the #3
Maxie: Thanks. I'll put you down for one terrible illness.
Travis: Thanks for touching on each area of the post. As for the WYR, nick berg didn't get to do much fighting, only flopping.
GingerMandy: Bacon is only gross if you're a Pig.
And unfortunately, just like Taxes, everybody pays up eventually.
Unless there's a Rapture.
P.S. Thanks for playing twice.
Jay: What, no comment on the bacon thing? As for the WYR, I'll put you down for a long illness also. Just hope it's not preceeded by a stroke, or that ruins your revenge plans.
adrienzgirl: I believe you also touched on each area of the post.
You too can have a long nasty illness with plenty of good drugs. These kids are all about the drugs nowadays.
As for your choice of Rob Zombie's WIFE......didn't you get that out of your system in college?
And, Yes, I definitely got "the Look" at our house. But is was IN the story first.
Nice trivia answer.
phairhead: There seems to be a rush on the Long illnesses today. Nobody likes pain and everybody wants drugs.
As for your trivia answer, I said I was thinking of a LETTER, not number. But the question was about time.
foul sally is probably the best name ever. And thanks :)
But what the kids will remember is that family devotion times also included laughter. Not a bad memory to help them think about adding the tradition to their family.
And to your last question -- it's time to take your meds!
Gosh... way to ruin a loving and sacrosanct moment!
They can't help their lidless nature!
Sally-Sal: You're welcome. It's well deserved.
Pastor David: That's what I hope. And I think you may have answered the Trivia question correctly.
Sebastian: It was already in the story. I mean, yeah, I pointed it out, but I didn't right it.
Zombieland was amazing but probably not as good as Army of Darkness.
I'd rather die the slow death - while painful for me it would be easier to convince chicks to sleep with me out of pity.
Shaun of the dead is the best zombie movie of all time.
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