Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Weird & Wacky News Wednesday

Man afraid of heights gets stuck on bungee ride
DALLAS(AP) — A suburban Dallas woman's well-meaning attempt to help her future husband overcome his fear of heights went horribly wrong when a bungee ride they were in got stuck 50 feet off the ground for three hours because cables got tangled.

Irony of the week?

Man says he was rejected by blood bank for seeming gay
(AP)An Indiana man says a blood donation center rejected him as a donor because he appears to be gay--even though he isn't. Aaron Pace, 22, recently visited Bio-Blood Components Inc., in Gary, which pays up to $40 for blood and plasma donations. But during the interview process, he said, he was told he couldn't give blood because he seems gay. Though Pace is "admittedly and noticeably effeminate," according to the Chicago Sun-Times, he says he's straight.

You never can be too careful. Those gays are sneaky blood donors.
Police: Drunken man arrested at sheriff's church
COOKEVILLE, Tenn. (AP) — Authorities in Tennessee say a drunken man was arrested after wandering into a church where the sheriff had been worshipping.

He was just coming for Communion.

Women urged to strip to support Putin as president
MOSCOW, Jul (Reuters) - An online campaign has been launched in Russia urging young women to support Prime Minister Vladimir Putin in a presidential vote by taking off their clothes, a lawmaker's site showed Sunday.

BEST campaign idea EVER!!

Sisters sue cemetery over grave mix-up
NEW YORK (Reuters) - Evelyn and Hortense Edwards spent two decades visiting what they thought was their mother's grave in a New Jersey cemetery only to discover it contained the remains of a stranger, according to court papers. Now, the sisters are suing, seeking want $25 million in damages (WTF!) from Rosehill Cemetery in Linden, New Jersey, for emotional distress caused when they learned that their mother, Beatrice Williams, had been buried in the wrong plot.

25 mil? Seriously? I wish someone would mix up MY dead relatives!

Feet first into the meat grinder: Gruesome death for sausage factory worker chewed up in front of his horrified colleagues
(DailyMailOnline)A 26-year-old sausage factory worker suffered a grisly end when he slipped and fell feet first into a meat grinder which chewed off his legs and killed him.

He didn't need no education. His last words were, "HEY, Teacher, leave those kids alone!".

FYI: This happened at a Bar S plant. Might want to skip their sausage for awhile.

Police officers shoot each other as they try to arrest child porn suspect at Harry Potter screening
Two policemen are recovering after they were shot by fellow officers as they tried to arrest a man on child pornography charges outside a crowded move theatre. The incident happened as undercover officers tried to apprehend the unarmed man (Nice!) in the parking lot as he left a screening of Harry Potter in Plainville, Connecticut.

It was a CROWDED theater and the kiddie-porn-perp was UNARMED. Nice.
"Hey, Let's open fire!"..."Wait. We're not very good shots."...."So, what's the worst that can happen?"
I think they were trying to do the public a service by eliminating a few Harry Potter fans, but missed.

Calif. disabled parking placards sent to the dead
SACRAMENTO, Calif. (AP) — Nearly 60,000 of California's more than 2 million disabled parking placards issued by the Department of Motor Vehicles might have been sent to dead people.

Do cemetaries have handicap plots?

Five Amish farmers die in New York road crash
NEW YORK(Reuters) - At least five Amish farmers were killed on Tuesday in upstate New York when a car trying to overtake a slow-moving tractor collided head-on with their van in what police described as a horrific crash.

Well, there's ONE barn that won't be raised in a day.


Anonymous said...

In Soviet Russia, clothes come off you!

I thought that was going to be a better joke. My apologies.

As for the meat grinder, I'm really glad I'm a vegetarian.

Also, I'm sure there's a Mrs. Lovett's Meat Pies/Sweeney Todd reference that's applicable.

Coffeypot said...

I guess only those who saw the Brick In The Wall video will get that one. And hitting an Amish van? He had to go through the horses first. Did the others die from having their head shoved up a horses ass?

Chris said...

Never. Eating. Sausage. Again. Ever.

Anonymous said...

Did they really have to say that the guys legs were "chewed off"...oh the visuals! So glad I don't eat sausage. What a hideous way to go. As for the dude who was afraid of heights...clearly not scared enough to stay off the stupid ass ride. I love these posts. The stupidity of people never stops amusing me!

BeckEye said...

Hortense Edwards should have sued her mother for naming her Hortense. AMIRIGHT OR AMIRIGHT OR AMIRIGHT??


I'm also afraid of heights. That's why I'm mediocre.

WhisperingWriter said...

Oh man, those poor police officers.


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