Tuesday, May 10, 2011

FACEBOOK Is The Devil!!! Part One!

Facebook is like a High School reunion that follows us around.

Seriously.

We reconnect with people we haven’t seen since High School.
(Completely forgetting the reason we lost touch in the first place wasn’t because of graduation, but because that person was a huge douche bag.)

We also get subjected to seeing how much better off everyone else is than us.

While we live paycheck to paycheck just to make ends meet, some of our classmates have travelled the world, climbed Everest, earned their doctorates or MD’s, have trophy/supermodel spouses, and boatloads of cash.

Often, we find ourselves perusing their photos, stalking their walls, or lurking around their status updates just looking for a weakness.

Just some little sliver of something to say, “Ah HA! There it is! Not so perfect now, are you?!”, thereby making ourselves feel better about ourselves.

Maybe we didn’t go to some fancy school, or even finish college.

Maybe we didn't methodically plot out our career path or life journey in 8th grade.

Maybe while you were drinking through Mom & Dad's tuition money, we were out living life in the real world.

Maybe we have a job that requires us to sit at a desk all day and pretend to work. (All while secretly plotting our fancy classmate’s destruction.)

Maybe we don’t make six figures, have nice cars, big houses, or take lush vacations.

Maybe we have a bunch of kids.

So what?!

Our life is GREAT!

We are HAPPY!

Can’t you see how F@%king happy we are?

CAN’T YOU?!?!

F@%K You, Facebook!

11 comments:

hotpants™ said...

*nods head in agreement*

laughingmom said...

See...that is why I don't do facebook. I wouldn't want the whole world to be jealous of me!!! I'd have to use aliases when I stayed in Paris and wear disguises to things like the Royal Wedding. I like my life in the shadows...

Matty said...

I have a personal FB account that I don't even use. I couldn't care less about classmates and where they are in life. I go there once in a blue moon to see what family members are up to, but that's about it.

Momma Fargo said...

The greatest thing about Facebook is when you get De-Facebooked and someone defriends you. It's just like high school again.

Anybody can put up fake pictures and fake lives. Us blue colors are just living the dream...LOL

Pat said...

Okay, so let's see,...WE travel...but not the WORLD....the United States though.....and YES my husband has a trophy wife (snort), and again, I reiterate....it's too bad that he won fourth place! Are you jealous of us? No wonder we're not friends on Facebook!

BeckEye said...

Oh, I've never forgotten that nearly everyone I went to HS with was a douchebag. I've gotten a few random FB requests from people who barely spoke to me back then and I've had to fight the urge to be a total bitch and ask why the hell they bothered to friend me. But maybe I should stop fighting that urge.

The Blue Zoo said...

I knew you were jealous of me. lol

I have "unfriended" people who had constantly annoying status updates. The people who cant spell at all really drive me nuts.

Rebecca Jo said...

Preach it brother...

I see my "friends" from high school going on "girl weekends" to freakin' island resorts? My idea of a girls weekend is a trip to Panera Bread...

Facebook has officially made me feel like the Leader of the Loser club...

Dorn said...

Worse than High School when you consider the "cool/successful" kids are hardly ever on FB. They don't necessarily brag about their shiz, they are just above it all. The rest of us need FB as the distraction from our sad jobs or lives.

Kev D. said...

"Can’t you see how F@%king happy we are?"

Hahaha... awesome dude. Nice blog.

You will DEFINITELY appreciate this:

http://highway10revisited.blogspot.com/2010/02/facial-recognition.html

Give it a read if you have some time.

Greg said...

If I had kept my facebook account I could have made up better lies. It's mostly bs.

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