Friday, March 4, 2011

Nduku Needs A Laptop About As Bad As He Needs A Snow Shovel.

Some Charities and Non-Profits are stupid.
Have you seen these commercials that say, “For every laptop you buy, we’ll send a laptop to an African child in a remote village.”?
YES!
Sign me up!
Because that is JUST was little Nduku needs.
Not some silly mosquito netting.
Or clean drinking water.
NO.
Instead…
Let’s give him a way to make sure that I receive a fresh and steady stream of crap like this:
Congraduation! You WINNERS of $10 MILLION Euros! We just need your accounts to complete wire transfer of monies. We are to be Bestest of Friends. So respond today. Don’t miss out on you chance to be Rich man.”
Just let the little MF’er get his laptop the same way all the other little African children do.
By waiting around until he is eventually adopted by Angelina Jolie

14 comments:

Moooooog35 said...

Where's he going to plug it in?

laughingmom said...

Must have great 3G coverage there - or 4G or whatever...

Must add a plug for a great org - Nothingbutnets.org - they do provide mosquito netting - check it out!

Joshua said...

@Moog -- No joke, they come with a handle that you have to crank. Just like every male on the planet.

Ed, you're right. No fucking point to giving him a laptop. Be better off getting him a lap dance.

Jewels said...

The kids I nanny for always say "that's nice...we should get one then they can get one." I nicely point out that they live in huts with no food or change of clothing and that the last thing they are going to worry about it having a laptop! The spoiled brats can't even entertain the idea of not having electricity, water, or wii...I've given up.

Think it would be okay to just ship them to Africa and make them live there for a month...maybe they'd come back a tad more appreciative.

Coffeypot said...

Oh, yeah! Don't forget to pack a box of electricity in with the computer because they don't have that either. And a couple of Twinkies, too, because they are also fucking starving. And if you really care, pack a flyswatter.

PBJdreamer said...

mooooooog exactly, where is the outlet

I am still waiting for Angelina Jolie to adopt me.


holding my breath

heee

that is all

Matty said...

LMAO, this is brilliant. Make it part of your routine.

Momma Fargo said...

LMFAO. I agree with Matty...great stand up. You rocked it.

The Offended Blogger said...

If they could invent a laptop made out of food I'd totally support that.

If they made it out of tacos I'd totally eat it.

Now I am craving tacos.

WhisperingWriter said...

LOL

I get e-mails like that often. I hate the ones that are really mean, the ones that say, YOU'VE WON A 5000 GIFT CARD TO TARGET!

It's not nice to tease a girl, scammers..

Tiffany said...

um. hilarious.

and at first i was like, who's nduku, but didn't want to seem stupid for not knowing he was some dictator and the latest douche in current events.

Barb said...

I agree with Matty. Great material.

The Blue Zoo said...

These commercials drive me crazy too. But of course I wouldnt actually say it outloud. I wouldnt want karma to come back and maybe break my leg or something.... =)

hotpants™ said...

I want Angie and Brad to adopt me. Just sayin'.

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