I am hooking up with Travis for a Memoir post. Haven't done one in awhile and I just remembered this. After reading mine, head over and check out the others.
I used to try to do the right thing, but it wouldn’t have me.
Case in point,
(sometime in Elementary school, maybe 1st or 3rd grade, the details are fuzzy)
We must have had the DARE cops come in and give us the drug talk.
“Just say NO!” and “Be cool, stay in school” or whatever…
I just remember them saying “dime bags aren’t a bag full of dimes” and “It will cost you most than a hundred dimes depending on how it’s cut”.
Maybe that was the guy on the corner.
Regardless, I just knew after that point that drugs were bad and I should rid the world of them.
Fast forward to a couple days later.
I’m out playing across the street by the “rich” neighbors house.
There was a white wood fence that outlined their property.
Imagine my surprise when I found them cultivating their own stash of weed along the fence row.
Sure enough, tiny plants with 5 pointy leaves, just growing like crazy.
Being the vigilant would-be-do-gooder I aspired to be, I gathered up as much of it as I could and raced home.
I placed them in a ziplock baggie and did the only sensible thing.
I took it to school the next day to show my teacher.
After a trip to the office and the police being called, I was asked about where I had acquired such illicit contraband.
I sung like a canary, thinking I was doing my best to rid the world of this THC-filled devil weed, and potentially saving some teenager a life of living in his mom's basement with nothing but a permanent case of Chinese eyes and uncontrollable giggles.
Just thinking that I had single-handedly saved the snack food industry from being molested by dopers with the munchies was reward enough.
Turned out the weed was just….weed.
Supposedly the police had it tested.
But I think really, the principal just tried smoking some.
He did always have Visine on his desk.