Remember I told you about my dirt bikes. If not, go here.
Remember I told you about my neighbor/skating partner? If not, go here.
Okay, well….that same neighbor had a dirt bike also. We used to ride them in this field next to my house.
I’ve included this custom area map for your viewing pleasure. (circa my childhood)
When they were building this subdivision, the genius contractors were just going along, throwing up ranch style houses flippity-flap, when lo & behold, they hit a gas main. Well, this caused their development plans to stop at my house. What was left was a big empty field with the hole for a foundation next door.
Jump to dirt bike days…
We had worn this little dirt bike course through the field.
It started out with a long straightaway, then a series of corners, followed by another straightaway into the foundation, and finished with a jump exiting the foundation and landing in my side yard.
We must have done this a hundred times, for several weeks.
One day, my neighbor gets a little extra speed and air…lands on his back tire…and rides a wheelie into the side of our house.
Thankfully he wasn’t hurt, but the same could not be said for the aluminum siding.
It was hilarious.
Unfortunately, his parents made him pay for the damages out of his McDonald’s paycheck.
He didn’t ride much after that.
I’m flying through the dirt bike course. It’s a new record time. By that, I mean….I was an idiot.
I come out of the foundation like Evil Knievel jumping Snake River Canyon.
I landed about 10 ft from the side of the house…..on my back tire…..with me dangling off the back barely clinging to the handlebars.
I had no way of backing off the throttle without letting go.
Dad had to fix the siding that time, since I was too young to have a job.
I did get grounded from the bike for awhile though, plus a really nice burn on my leg from the exhaust.
When I finally got back on the bike, I took it easy through that foundation.
Here's a bonus story:
I almost killed myself in the corn field across the street.
They had harvested the corn and I was flying through there about 50 mph when I hit a HUGE dirt clump.
The bike came to a complete stop.
I instantly achieved what the Wright Brothers failed for years to do.
I didn’t even need a plane.
I flew like superman for what seemed like either 100 yards or 5 minutes.
There’s still some debate between my head and my ass.
Regardless, by landing was a graceful head plant. By head plant, I mean my helmet landed first, sunk in the dirt, and my body momentarily stuck straight up like a corn stalk, then fell over.
I lay there for an hour, believing I was either dead, or paralyzed, or both.
I miss that dirt bike. Maybe I should get the boys one.