Wednesday, December 30, 2009

My Truck is a DINOSAUR.......RRAAWWWRRRR!!!

I had to post this, because I'm pretty sure my truck is secretly a dinosaur, and I wanted there to be photographic evidence before it's too late and it eats someone like in the movie Christine.

The last couple of days, my truck has had some wicked looking teeth. I'm pretty sure these are for eating slow drivers and hitchhiking babies.

I know this all sounds crazy, which not only means it's most likely true, but seeing how I've only had this truck about a year, and it's quite possible that it's a Transformer like Bumblebee, but meaner and T-Rex-ier.

Maybe it's a Decepticon.

All I know is that it's good at hiding its vicious fangs in the summer, but come winter, it's feeding time.

I can't help feeling sorry for all those blue-haired Sunday drivers and wondering hobo infants.

See for yourself.



Case closed.

35 comments:

Kimi@SoManyKids... said...

My Suburban Wyoming Icicles would eat your truck for lunch. For reals. But I'm pretty sure it is definitely a Decepticon. Don't turn your back on it is all I'm sayin...

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...

my 7 year old son just had to translate this entire post for me. :)

Travis said...

Sometimes your truck has to eat small children to keep running right.

I think it's because it's a Honda.

Tony said...

Yeah, your truck is definitely a Decepticon. Maybe something meaner and more bad ass...like if Hannibal Lector was a Transformer. So a Lectorcon.

Steam Me Up, Kid said...

Scary icicles. I hope nobody accidentally exhales on them or anything.

Coffeypot said...

But it's Japanese...maybe Godzilla or Mothra (or what ever the fuckers was called.)

I you want a year-round ass eater, get a Ford or a Chevrolet or a Mopar or a GMC. A manly truck.

Corrie Howe said...

My daughter says, Bumblebee. My son says he has no idea. But I do see some evidence that it has been eating when you aren't around. I know because I watch all those forensic shows. There is a blue hair in the grill and some blood splatter on its hood. Car washes don't always destroy the evidence.

The Vegetable Assassin said...

AW man, when I was a kid "Christine" terrified me. What an evil BITCH! I seem to remember seeing "The Car" on TV as a kid too and that terrifying me as well and yet I saw that recently and it was HIGH-LARIOUS!

Your truck, however, is cute and smiley. I mean it's Japanese, how can it not be? Unless it's a kamikaze truck...

Pearl said...

Yum! Hobos! :-)

Pearl

Alex said...

Ba ha ha ha.

Decepticon definately (they're cooler).

Meagan@Megs7827 said...

I want a picture of old guy and a blog written by him.

Carol said...

Because I am the nice one here, I will be the first to say that YES, your ass looks HUGE!

xxoo,
June

justsomethoughts... said...

i do like the truck

where do the bones go ?

Daffy said...

Christine is the badassest movie ever. I can't tell you how stoked I am that someone else has not only seen it but mentions it in a post.

You just upped yourself....(heeee that sounds funny) on the Cool Cats meter....

Also, I joined the Honda club but mine doesn't have teeth...presently Harriet (yes, that's her name) looks much like the Abominable Snowman from the old Roudolf movie...sans teeth....

adrienzgirl said...

My Jeep is deep undercover, you know seeing that we live in Florida where it never gets cold enough for the teeth to come out! :D

Ed Adams said...

Kimi: Thanks for the threat and the tip.

Monique: At least SOMEONE gets me.

Travis: It runs great, because it's a Honda and because there's lots of baby hitchhikers. Or WERE lots.

Tony: Lectorcon! Damnit, why didn't I think of that?

Streamy: Ha! You totally jinxed him, and all his teeth fell off.

Coffeypot: Godzilla! Ha! Good one! Although, since the Honda Ridgeline is entirely made in Canada, maybe it's more Hockeyacon!

Corrie Howe: I tried bleach, but I think he's totally getting busted.

Veggie Killer: I remember The Car. My dad had just about every car related movie ever made, which he subjected me to my entire youth.

Pearl: I agree. Or better yet, Hobo Bacon. Mmmmmmmm....nom,nom,nom.

Alex: That's what my 10 yr old says too. I was always more of an Autobot type guy.

Meagan: Stay tuned, it's coming. It will probably be a vlog.

Carol: Thanks for being the nice one.

justsomethoughts: It's a Honda. It recycles them.

Daffy: Christine was the shit. And Hondas ROCK!

adrienzgirl: You don't even need a Jeep down there. You need a convertible.

tattytiara said...

My poor little Toyota Echo's a reverse stegosaurus.

Miss Yvonne said...

Oh yeah?? Well, my car's got lots of dirt on the sides of it that kind of look like wings when you squint. Also, you have to be drunk.

carissajaded said...

Is that a truck? okkk. But your ass is huge. So I'll give you that! :)

ScoMan said...

I'm not sure if your truck is a dinosaur, but I don't want to be the hitchhiking baby in front of it.

Moooooog35 said...

Dude..it's a Honda.

Those aren't teeth.

They're chopsticks.

Martinis or Diaper Genies? said...

I can't say anything because I can't understand this. I need a boy or a child's help

kim said...

You and my husband have exactly the same handwriting. Do they pull you aside and teach you this in high school? :-)
Thanks for stopping by my blog, I hope to see you again. Now that i've seen yours I'll be sure to stop by again!

Just Another Momma said...

Nothing compares to Bumblebee. Nice teeth, I am also wondering where the bones go??

The Blue Zoo said...

hhmmm, must be a Decepticon. For sure.

Dont worry. Everyone knows - Blogging adds at last 10 pounds to your ass.

Hissyfits & Halos said...

Okay, after your "yeargasm" comment on Tanks post, I had to come check out your blog. Too cute! I had to add yah.

Don't let anyone give yah crap about driving a Honda. Only SEXY people drive Hondas. I drive an Oddyssey, and call it the sessy-machine! It doesn't have teeth, though. I think it's an herbivore.

kys said...

Since it's Japanese that is obviously Godzilla.

Erin said...

this cracks me up. we have icicles everywhere up here right now.

I'm your newest follower---have been seeing you around (we follow a lot of the same peeps) and am sorry it's taken me so long to stop by.

Happy New Year!!

Ed Adams said...

tattytiara: Not everybody can have a meat eater. They are a special breed.

Miss Yvonne: Gee, I hope it doesn't ran and make your wings fall off.

carissajaded: They say the camera adds 10 pounds. And makes your shadow ass look fat.

ScoMan: Being a baby hitchhiker is definitely not something I would recommend.

Mooooog35: Maybe they're more of a combination of teeth and chopsticks. What's that? Toothpicks? Washington's dentures?

MODG: Feel free to abduct a child to get help translating my post.

Kim: This is my mouse writing. My actual handwriting is worse. It's a learned talent that only guys are awesome enough to acquire.

Just Another Momma: Bumblebee is Awesome. And the bones are recycled since this is a Honda.

The Blue Zoo: Thanks for the excuses. I hope my doctor will agree.

Hissyfits & Halos: Thanks & Welcome.

kys: Genius! I think you're right!

Erin: Thanks & welcome: I too have seen you around so much, I thought we were already following each other. Now we are.

Phillipia said...

Hmmm...if that's a truck, your ass is huge..

But shadows always add a few pounds...

Love reading your posts, Ed. I am playing catch up tonight...

Captain Dumbass said...

It just needs some nasty ice eyebrows to make it look meaner.

And dude, your truck have a bench seat up front for that ass?

deepteshpoetry said...

Lol.happy New year Ed...thanks 4 making me laugh this new year..n chk out my latest post plz

Forgotten said...

Those aren't icicles, they're snotsicles from all it's tiny little foreign parts weeping from the cold. Sorry, I'm a Chevy girl all the way.

Nice shadow ass, BTW. I'm with Captain Dumbass, you need the bench seat. ;-)

Thanks for all the funny and Happy New Year!

Secretia said...

The kids probably decided it looked like a dinosaur. Like the great scarlet Hondasaurus Rex?

Secretia

Ed Adams said...

Phillipia: Thanks for the kind words. Which don't include the ones that said my ass was bigger than my truck.

Capt.Dumbass: Nope. I squeeze it into bucket seats. It's like a fat girl driving a Datsun.

deeptesh: Thanks. It's been my pleasure giving you pleasure. Wait. That sounded gayer than I meant.

Forgotten: IT'S MADE IN CANADA! Chevy's are assembled in the US, but are full of Korean and Mexican parts. Happy New Year!

Secretia: I luv it. I shall now refer to it as Hondosaurus Rex. Thanks.

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